Who Pays Bridal Shower: Essential Etiquette Mistakes You Cannot Make

How much do you pay? And how do you even discuss who pays?

Traditionally, the maid of honor hosts and pays for the bridal shower. But in more modern times, this tradition is changing. In this article, we’ll delve into ‘who pays’ for the bridal shower etiquette to uncover who pays, how much they pay, and also how to have the ‘who pays’ conversation. We promise you, that this etiquette guide will save you from potential embarrassment and side glances.

Who Pays For The Bridal Shower

Whoever hosts, whoever pays. Usually, that’s the maid of honor who hosts and pays for the bridal shower. But if there are a group of people hosting such as the bride’s close family/friends or a group of bridesmaids, then they pay. Although there are traditional conventions, really there are no rules! If you are comfortable, you can even ask the bride to pay for the bridal shower. We encourage having an open discussion with the bride or the bridal planners. Not having conversations about who pays for the bridal shower because it’s awkward will lead to problems down the line. Keep reading and you’ll find out how to navigate this ‘who pays for the bridal shower’ conversation gracefully. Remember, this isn’t about pinching pennies but about navigating logistics when celebrating the bride with a bridal shower.

How much does a bridal shower cost? Let’s Break It Down!

If you’re paying for the bridal shower, you definitely want to know how much you’re paying for. As we explain in our article on genius ways to save on bridal shower costs, for an average bridal shower, if you’re paying for the bridal shower, you’re looking at anywhere from $300 to $3,000. But if you’re aiming for a more budget-friendly celebration, you can absolutely make it work for as low as $300 to $500.

Here’s a breakdown of where those dollars tend to go:

• Venue Rental: $75 to $900 (25-30% of budget)
  • This will be your biggest expense if you’re opting for a venue. It can range from a cozy space to a full-fledged event hall. If you’re keeping things at home, you’ll save big on this front.
• Decorations: $45 to $600 (15-20% of budget)
  • Adding that special touch with decorations is key. This can range from floral arrangements to banners and table settings. Budget about $45 to $600 for this category.
• Catering and Drinks: $90 to $1,050 (30-35% of budget)
  • Food and drinks tend to be the heart of any party. Whether you’re hiring a caterer or going the potluck route, this will likely be your biggest expense. But there are plenty of easy and mouth-watering bridal shower food ideas that your guests will love you for.
• Activities and Games: $30 to $450 (10-15% of budget)
  • Keeping the party lively with activities and games is a must. This category can range from trivia to fun photo booths. Budget around $30 to $450 for this part of the celebration.
• Favors and Prizes: $15 to $300 (5-10% of budget)
  • Sending guests home with a little token of appreciation is a lovely touch. This could be personalized trinkets or small keepsakes. Allocate about $15 to $300 for favors and prizes.
• Miscellaneous Expenses: $15 to $300 (5-10% of budget)
  • Sometimes, there are unexpected costs that pop up. Whether it’s last-minute decorations or unforeseen expenses, having a little extra set aside (around $15 to $300) can be a lifesaver.

Remember, these are just general guidelines. If you’re paying for the bridal shower, your actual costs might vary depending on your specific choices and priorities. The key is to plan ahead, stick to your budget, and most importantly, enjoy every moment of the celebration! You’re creating beautiful memories, and that’s priceless!

Some themes are more expensive than others. For example:

• $$$: on the higher end if your bride fancies the fancy and usually involves venue hiring cost such as a Breakfast at Tiffany’s or Bridgerton bridal shower
• $$: if your bride wants a unique theme and unique decor/food such as a tea party bridal shower or lemon-themed bridal shower
• $: for your bride who values having a good time while keeping a lower budget such as a garden party bridal shower or beach-themed bridal shower (no venue hire costs at all!). Or, you can have a small bridal shower instead with a smaller guest list for an intimate and special celebration.

Obviously, these are rough guides, and for any theme, you can adjust the decoration and foods accordingly to match your budget.

Navigating the ‘Who Pays Bridal Shower’ Conversation for the Bridal Shower

We know that for a lot of people, talking about money is super awkward. But having the ‘who pays bridal shower’ conversation is a crucial step in ensuring a harmonious and stress-free planning process. In fact, it’s the best way to prevent misunderstandings and drama down the line. Here’s how you can approach it with grace and transparency:

1. Initiate the Conversation Early: Broaching the subject of finances may feel a bit sensitive, but it’s essential. Early discussions lay the foundation for a seamless planning process. You should talk about this before setting the theme (some themes are more expensive than others!).
2. Acknowledge the Sensitivity: Begin the conversation by acknowledging that talking about money can be a bit sensitive. Assure everyone involved that the goal is to create a celebration that aligns with the bride’s vision and everyone’s comfort levels.
3. Engage the Bride: The bride is at the heart of this celebration, so her input is invaluable. Ask her about her preferences and any budgetary constraints she or her family might have. This sets the tone for planning within realistic parameters.
4. Set a Realistic Budget: Based on the bride’s vision and the financial capabilities of those involved, establish a budget. This serves as a guide for decision-making moving forward.
5. Discuss Individual Contributions: If there’s a group involved in planning, convene a meeting early on. Discuss who is willing and able to contribute and in what capacity. Some may offer financial support, while others might prefer to cover specific expenses.
6. Document Agreements: Once decisions are made, it’s wise to document who will be responsible for each aspect of the celebration. This helps to ensure everyone is on the same page.
7. Emphasize Open Communication: Stress the importance of maintaining open lines of communication throughout the planning process. Encourage everyone to voice concerns or suggestions as they arise.
8. Plan Together: If possible, involve everyone in the decision-making process, so that each person feels invested in the celebration’s success.
9. No Drama, Just Collaboration: Reiterate that the goal is to have a seamless, drama-free planning experience. Open communication ensures that everyone’s expectations are aligned.

Remember, this discussion is not about being stingy; it’s about being practical and considerate. By addressing finances and who pays for the bridal shower upfront, you pave the way for a joyful and memorable bridal shower that everyone can enjoy without any unnecessary stress or drama.

How To Plan A Bridal Shower

If you’re paying and planing for the bridal shower, it can seem overwhelming at first. But we promise you, it can be a lot easier than it seems with secret tips and tricks up your sleeves that make bridal shower planning straightforward. So what are your actual responsibilities?

As outlined in our Comprehensive Bridal Shower Planning Guide, our approach adopts an inverted pyramid structure. We urge you to begin with grand visions and essential elements, such as choosing the venue, before diving into specifics. This foundational decision shapes every facet of your bridal shower, from invitations to decor. Now, what’s the ultimate aim of our bridal shower checklist?

The Bridal Shower Goal: celebrate and support the bride-to-be and create lasting memories.

There are 6 key aspects you need to nail for the perfect bridal shower in your bridal shower checklist:

1. Bridal vision (important details, theme, venue)
2. Invitations
3. Decor
4. Menu
5. Games/Activities
6. Favors

Here’s an infographic step by step guide:

1. Choose Date, Time, and Budget:
   • Collaborate with the bride to set a date, time, and budget that works for everyone involved.
2. Select Venue and Theme:
   • Decide on a suitable venue and theme in line with the bride’s preferences.
3. Compile Guest List and Send Invites:
   • Create a guest list with the bride and send out invites well in advance.
4. Plan Menu and Decor:
   • Work with the bride to choose a menu and decorations that complement the chosen theme.
5. Organize Activities and Games:
   • Plan engaging activities to keep guests entertained.
6. Prepare Favors and Timeline:
   • Create thoughtful favors and establish a timeline for the day.
7. Set Up, Coordinate, and Facilitate:
   • Arrive early to set up, coordinate during the event, and facilitate any activities.
8. Express Gratitude:
   • Thank all contributors and guests after the event.

By following this concise guide, you’ll host a memorable bridal shower that’s enjoyable for all involved. Your thoughtful planning will create a special day for the bride and guests to cherish.

Conclusion

In the realm of bridal shower etiquette, understanding who pays for the bridal shower is pivotal. While tradition suggests the maid of honor typically pays for the bridal shower, modern times offer more flexibility. Navigating this conversation with grace is essential to avoid any awkward situations down the line. Open communication, setting realistic budgets, and involving the bride in the discussion are key steps. Remember, this isn’t about pinching pennies, but rather about creating a celebration that aligns with everyone’s comfort levels. So, embrace this conversation early, plan with transparency, and you’ll orchestrate a bridal shower that leaves everyone beaming with joy. Happy planning!